Friday, June 12, 2009

The Renaissance of Love Letters

According to private sources, Email may be the best thing that ever happened to love, letter-wise.

With the recent appointment of a Cyber Security Czar by President Obama the secret is out. Basically, security on the internet hardly exists. Millions and millions of computers are infected with dozens of eavesdropping viruses, adware, spyware, and who-knows-what-ware. Practically all PC users have had virus problems unless they use a Mac.

Thus, with the downgrade of the Internet, the privacy of Emails has become a major issue.

Particularly when it comes to love. Your private thoughts are not safe if you send them by Email. This is a problem.You know, love is a tricky thing. It is done in private. Emails just don’t cut it for love letters anymore, security-wise.

Perhaps this is a small thing. But it could be the start of something big. Love letters are coming back. The ones you agonize over, write, stamp, and send. The last true intimate way of expressing one’s passions over distance, it turns out.

Of course, they cost more now, 44 cents. But that is still a small price to pay for love. Just ask Mr. Tech Manners.


Mr. Tech Manners’ nephew has been visiting this past week, and the boy is officially smitten. In Love. All the tell tale signs are there: he just hangs around the house, listless, haunted, and pulling his classmate’s picture from his back pocket now to gaze at it wistfully. He seems to check his cell phone several times an hour for messages, and then mopes some more.

“How are things going today?” Mr. Tech Manners sometimes asks. His nephew just shrugs.

“No texts, no Email, no phone calls, no nothing,” he moans. “She’s completely forgotten about me. I knew this would happen.”

“Why don’t you write her a letter, she’ll probably get it tomorrow.

His nephew shrugged again, and sat down in front of the TV but didn’t turn it on. He just stared at the black screen. It was painful to watch.

“OK,” Mr. Tech Manners said. “Just an idea. But if you do write one, write it by hand. It’s better that way.”

Several hours later, his nephew marched into his office, an envelope in hand.

“Well, I did it. I still don’t know whether I should. Do you have a stamp?”

Mr. Tech Manners handed him one, and added “the mail girl has already been here today, but we can put the letter in the mailbox on the corner, if you want it to go out today.”

Arriving at the mailbox, Mr. Tech Manners stood by, while his nephew opened the mailbox lid, but then went catatonic. He turned to Mr. Technology Manners, clueless.

“Do you want me to put it in?” Robotically, his nephew handed him the letter, Mr. Tech Manners put it in. The two silently returned to the house.

The next day, up in his office Mr. Tech Manners could hear his nephew pacing around downstairs. Then he heard the nephew’s cell phone ring, followed by what sounded like a excited chattering. This was followed by the sound of several “Yes!”, “Yes!”, “Yes!” hoots, and soon by the scent of cheeseburgers cooking. Love can make a guy hungry!


Try it! Shower the people you love with love. There is nothing like writing or getting a love letter. It really sticks out among all those awful bills.

Write one to the one you love. Then you can spend the next day or two just like Mr. Tech Manners’ nephew, pacing back and forth, second-guessing every word in the letter, even sending it! Just like the old days. What a thrill!

Unfortunately, over the years, a lot of us have gotten used to typing. So when we opt for it, our handwriting isn’t what it used to be. Lord Byron love letters, handwriting-wise, these are not.

But nevertheless, as an alternative to tweeting, calling, blogging, or Emailing, love letters seem to be coming back into style. Could drive-ins be far behind! Hard to say.

But me, I’m betting my 44 cents on love. I just wish I could read my own handwriting.

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